Author Topic: Evil King Hooman  (Read 7999 times)

Offline Hooman

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Evil King Hooman
« on: November 30, 2005, 07:58:37 PM »
Evil King Hooman has decided to kill DM-Horus..., because well, I'm an evil king. But, I've decided to grant him one leniency. He may choose the way in which he will die. How should he choose to die?

(For those of you that don't get the joke, click here,Here)
 

Offline Sirbomber

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« Reply #1 on: November 30, 2005, 08:14:03 PM »
That spike thing that punctures you in a way that none of your vital organs touched.
That helmet-thing where'd they pull on your neck and kinda dislocate it or something so you suffocate.
Getting pulled apart.
Burnt at the stake.
Crucified.
Basically I'm okay with anything from the Spanish Inquistion scene from History of the World Part 1. That's a funny movie...
A starflare bomb is strapped to his crotch. The bomb is VERY sensitive to shock and vibration. If he breathes, it explodes.
A supernova is strapped to his crotch. It just explodes while you're watching.
A laser/microwave slowly cuts off parts of his body until it's focused on his face.
He's shot with a stickyfoam grenade, which covers his face, so he suffocates.
He's shot with an ESG which electrocutes him to death.
Shot with an Acid Cloud Grenade with melts his skin off, then melts his organs.
Rail Gun/RPG to the chest.
Bombarded with Emp Grenades/Missiles until he dies from being hit by blunt objects.
Scorpion/spider climbs up him and slowly eats his face off.
Thor's Hammer rips his skin off or does whatever a Thor's Hammer would do to a person.
A ConVec/Repair Vec/Earthworker's manipulator arm rips his head off.
Robo Dozer makes him become one with the ground.
A Scout runs over him at such a high velocity he splatters all over the place.
A Cargo Truck dumps wreckage on him. The wreckage is full of sharp metal and glass objects.
He's locked in an Evac Transport which is driven into a volcano while he's in it.
A Robo Surveyor uses it's pick thing to slice open his chest.
A GeoCon/Robo-Miner builds on top of him and either drills through him or pushes him into the magma vent or fumarole.

Well, you have death by any Outpost 2 vehicle or weapon and a few other nasty fates. Pick one.
"As usual, colonist opinion is split between those who think the plague is a good idea, and those who are dying from it." - Outpost Evening Star

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Offline Hooman

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« Reply #2 on: November 30, 2005, 08:32:05 PM »
How did I know you'd be the first to answer?  :P

Hmm, that first one reminds me of something I'd heard in a story before. Only, it was a coffin like device with spikes to puncture EVERY major organ. Certainly a good way to ensure death I guess.
 

Offline Sirbomber

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« Reply #3 on: November 30, 2005, 08:43:35 PM »
You might have known I'd be first to answer, but did you expect such a variety of options? (I think we know who'd be in charge of executions and torture for Evil King Hooman's Evil Kingdom).

And they had different varieties. There was the "Instant-Kill" one that punctured your organs and the "Torture/Slow and Painful" method that just caused severe pain.

Oh, that reminds me of this rope thing they'd use to gouge your eyes out. Gotta love the Middle Ages.
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Offline Hooman

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« Reply #4 on: November 30, 2005, 09:04:27 PM »
Oh my. Sorta sounds like death from 1000 slices.

I also rather enjoyed "Robo Dozer makes him become one with the ground".


The thing is, if you were in charge of executions, I don't think I'd have an evil empire for very long. Either everyone would be executed, or they'd all rebel against me.
 

Offline CK9

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« Reply #5 on: November 30, 2005, 09:42:37 PM »
logically:
of old age and natural causes

realistically:
you'd drop an anvil on his head
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Offline dm-horus

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« Reply #6 on: November 30, 2005, 10:56:50 PM »
Death by snoo snoo!


"We need rest. The spirit is willing, but the flesh is spongy, and bruised."

Offline CK9

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« Reply #7 on: December 01, 2005, 01:01:14 AM »
lmao, damn, That would be an almost pleasant death
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Offline Eddy-B

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Evil King Hooman
« Reply #8 on: December 01, 2005, 02:38:15 AM »
Rule #1:  Eddy is always right
Rule #2: If you think he's wrong, see rule #1
--------------------

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Offline Hooman

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« Reply #9 on: December 01, 2005, 02:50:32 AM »
Yeah CK9 got the logical answer I was expecting.

What the heck is snoo snoo?

Nice one Eddy.
 

Offline CK9

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« Reply #10 on: December 01, 2005, 11:31:51 AM »
hooman, there is a show called futerama
on one episode, they crash land on a planet of giant women, who always kill the men.  They decided to kill the three guys by snoo snoo (their word for the reproduction process)
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Offline spirit1flyer

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« Reply #11 on: December 01, 2005, 12:35:55 PM »
Quote
Scorpion/spider climbs up him and slowly eats his face off.

oo sounds like Lost in Space :P  

 
"Until you stalk and overrun You can't devour anyone"


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Offline Hooman

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« Reply #12 on: December 01, 2005, 05:00:35 PM »
Oh my. Sounds like death by ooga booga.  :unsure:
 

Offline Sirbomber

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« Reply #13 on: December 01, 2005, 05:00:36 PM »
Lost in space? What the heck is that?
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Offline Eddy-B

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« Reply #14 on: December 01, 2005, 05:09:53 PM »
Quote
Lost in space? What the heck is that?
that's the conestoga, crashing into a planet in space: there are 48 survivors, and there's a monster on the planet. Then there's a hatcj that goes down underground, and they find an old spacecraft burried there, but the have to keep typing in 3 6 12 33 74 every 128 minutes to keep it from going critical, blowing up the planet.

:P
Rule #1:  Eddy is always right
Rule #2: If you think he's wrong, see rule #1
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Offline spirit1flyer

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« Reply #15 on: December 01, 2005, 05:13:18 PM »
its a movie about a family who is sent to start a colony on another planet but some stuff is damaged by a crazy robot and they get lost  :P  
"Until you stalk and overrun You can't devour anyone"


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Offline Hooman

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« Reply #16 on: December 01, 2005, 05:16:51 PM »
As Eddy spread misinformation and lies in an attempt to undermine... something. Maybe communism/capitalism.  :P

Lost in space was an old old TV show about people that ... got lost in space. Big surprise there. There is also a movie that was made much more recently. It has that Joey guy from friends, and he does some of the worst acting that you'll ever see. But it was done in a kinda funny bad sort of way. I suspect it may have been on purpose. Anyways, they were off to colonize a remote world but their ship had been sabatoged to crash into the sun before leaving the solar system. They manage to escape by engaging the engines without a course laid in, and end up lost. The sabateur was two-timed and is still aboard, becoming an evil dirt backstabbing member crew (in the TV show I think?) or mostly just a prisoner in the movie. Although, they still give him enough freedom to cause problems.
 

Offline BlackBox

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« Reply #17 on: December 01, 2005, 05:24:32 PM »
LOL Eddy.

|> 4 8 15 16 23 42

(Presses EXECUTE button)

(Numbers reset to 108 00)

But remember: "Do not attempt to use the microcomputer for any other purpose...duction into the system."

Ok, enough for now.

If you don't understand it -- you just won't understand it.

Hmm, can we kill Horus by having him lick the GORF with his tongue? That was was Emma wanted to rather do than go see the poetry in the forum (it's true, read the help file)

Offline Eddy-B

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« Reply #18 on: December 01, 2005, 05:27:38 PM »
© the Hanso Foundation !
Rule #1:  Eddy is always right
Rule #2: If you think he's wrong, see rule #1
--------------------

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Offline BlackBox

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« Reply #19 on: December 01, 2005, 05:28:59 PM »
Did you see last night's episode yet?

It involves, err, the film.

Offline Sirbomber

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« Reply #20 on: December 01, 2005, 05:29:40 PM »
Why stop there? She has loads of other good ideas. Actually, I mentioned 2 of them...
Quote
"Couldn't I just go dive into a magma vent?  Attempt to stomp out the Blight with my bare feet?  Maybe go clean the GORF with my tongue?"..."I know, I'll volunteer as a practice target for the StickyFoam tanks!"

I'm surprised I didn't mention the other two, but they really aren't unit related...

Or he could fight the crazy Plymouth Storage Tank worker's imaginary alien friends.

Quote
On either side of the [dark] Elder, dark spidery shapes shimmered into existence, tentacles waving like black ropes.  One of them pointed an alien weapon at Tank.  "No uncontrolled human has ever seen us and lived.  You will be no exception.  Prepare to die, human!"

Ah, the help file is full of fun and insanity. I check it regularly.
"As usual, colonist opinion is split between those who think the plague is a good idea, and those who are dying from it." - Outpost Evening Star

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Offline leeor_net

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« Reply #21 on: December 01, 2005, 11:23:00 PM »
Emma has always been the witty one.

I particularly like the driving off the click into a magma vent.

You could always feed him to the blight or give him a one way ride on a satalite deployment.

As far as Lost in Space, the movie didn't have them just engage the engines in any old direction, they actually went through the sun. Just a tad bit unrealist if you ask me.

I tell you though, it'd be lot of fun if I could have an onstage view of a self-contained thermo-nuclear explosion.

Offline Betaray

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« Reply #22 on: December 01, 2005, 11:28:57 PM »
it would be bright, very very bright lol
I am the nincompoop, I eat atomic bombs for breakfest, fusion bombs for lunch, and anti-matter bombs for dinner

I just hope they don't explode

Offline CK9

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« Reply #23 on: December 01, 2005, 11:39:05 PM »
okay, where is all this coming from?
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Offline Freeza-CII

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Evil King Hooman
« Reply #24 on: December 02, 2005, 01:29:43 AM »
Iron Maiden
Disemboweled