Two married buddies are out drinking one night when one turns to
the other and says, "You know, I don't know what else to do.
Whenever I go home after we've been out drinking, I turn the
headlights off before I get to the driveway. I shut off the engine
and coast into the garage. I take my shoes off before I go into the
house, I sneak up the stairs, get undressed in the bathroom, stick
my foot in the toilet and pee down my leg to prevent splashing
sounds. I ease into bed and my wife STILL wakes up and yells at me
for staying out so late!"
His buddy looks at him and says, "Well, you're obviously taking the
wrong approach. I screech into the driveway, slam the door, storm
up the steps, throw my shoes in the closet, jump into bed, slap her
on the ass and shout, 'WHO'S HORNY?' and she acts like she's asleep
every time!"
