Outpost Universe Forums

Off Topic => Test/Spam Forum => Forum Games => Topic started by: jcj94 on April 20, 2011, 01:21:34 PM

Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: jcj94 on April 20, 2011, 01:21:34 PM
What do you break just to fix?

(Post your joke riddle as well)
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: Freeza-CII on April 20, 2011, 02:29:24 PM
computers tvs cars runs of shelves morgan wheels cigars pipes music players ect.  
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: CK9 on April 20, 2011, 05:18:08 PM
tape.  You tear off a piece to use it to fix something.
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: jcj94 on April 22, 2011, 07:48:12 PM
Noone's gotten this?  really?

Wow..

HINT:

Food
 
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: CK9 on April 22, 2011, 08:21:04 PM
well, you break an egg to fix up an omlet...or however the hell it's spelt...
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: jcj94 on April 22, 2011, 08:42:25 PM
DING DING DING WE HAVE A WINNER!
CK9, good guess.  omelet btw.

NEXT RIDDLE!

What do we create that can't be seen, smelled, heard, or tasted, but can kill us faster than we can realize, and is completely harmless to other forms of life?
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: Hooman on April 22, 2011, 10:47:10 PM
An idea.
 
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: jcj94 on April 22, 2011, 10:51:19 PM
... I really need to make these things more difficult...

Good work Hooman.

Allright, Someone else post a joke riddle.


(I have one, but am posting at as last resort, you solved it to quick, I didn't have enough time to get another one in the future)
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: Hooman on April 23, 2011, 12:48:09 AM
Umm, how about:
Feed it and it lives. Give it a drink and it dies. What is it?
 
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: Hidiot on April 23, 2011, 02:15:01 AM
Any electrical device: you feed it energy and it works, you feed it a conducting liquid (not pure water) and it short-circuits and dies.
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: Hooman on April 23, 2011, 04:05:39 AM
Hmm, not quite the answer I was looking for, but I suppose that works too. Alright then.
 
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: Spikerocks101 on April 23, 2011, 08:58:52 AM
A Gremlin?
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: jcj94 on April 23, 2011, 09:18:19 AM
Fire
 
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: Hooman on April 23, 2011, 06:08:22 PM
Fire was the answer I was thinking of. Which, oddly enough, you can get from giving electrical equipment a drink. :P
 
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: jcj94 on April 23, 2011, 06:44:28 PM
Whats so fragile that when you say its name it breaks?



or




What goes on four legs, two at noon, and 3 legs evening?


 
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: Hooman on April 23, 2011, 10:02:17 PM
For the first one: silence.
 
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: CK9 on April 24, 2011, 12:49:05 AM
second one is the very old mankind riddle
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: jcj94 on April 24, 2011, 09:20:39 AM
Hooman, correct!
CK9, it's the Sphinx's Riddle, and yes, Mankind is the answer!



What goes without saying, but needs to be said? What has no arms, no legs, no head?
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: Freeza-CII on April 24, 2011, 01:54:22 PM
a torso with legs
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: jcj94 on April 24, 2011, 04:11:23 PM
*facepalm*

How...

*double facepalm*

(http://nicedeb.files.wordpress.com/2009/11/wh-double-facepalm.jpg)

or better yet...

(http://lolpics.se/pics/482.jpg)


or even better YET...

(http://darren8770.googlepages.com/TacticalFacePalm.jpg)


Completely and utterly the wrong answer...
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: Spikerocks101 on April 24, 2011, 07:04:25 PM
jcj... just no...
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: jcj94 on April 24, 2011, 07:46:43 PM
Hooman, you usually get these riddles...  Have not you been on or solved it yet?

Here is a hint: Reading.
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: Hooman on April 24, 2011, 08:32:47 PM
I was still puzzling over the Sphinx riddle. I had to look that one up to understand the answer.

You asked two questions. Are they part of the same riddle, or two different riddles?
Are you talking about something like a body of literature?
 
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: jcj94 on April 24, 2011, 09:08:37 PM
Wow... you didn't even know what it was and got it.
Yes, both were the same riddle.

Yes, body of literature (You don't say your reading the Body of a letter, but the body itself needs to be written( or said), the rest is fairly self explanatory)


... Hooman, stop being good. :P no don't.  Most of these wouldn't get solved much without you.

Man walks on 4 legs (crawls) in morning (early life), on two at noon (midlife/adulthood) and 3 (two legs and a cane) in afternoon (late life, now classified as your "70's - 80's).
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: CK9 on April 25, 2011, 01:28:57 AM
okay, here's one off the top of my head ('cause I'm bored)

I see all but one at any time, reading them so carefully, and while I can see the one at times, it's never the same others see.

What is it?
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: jcj94 on April 25, 2011, 10:22:01 AM
Letters?
 
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: CK9 on April 26, 2011, 03:41:05 AM
nope, you'll probably groan when you figgure it out.
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: jcj94 on April 26, 2011, 09:14:07 AM
Stars?
Moon?
Sun(s)?
 
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: CK9 on April 26, 2011, 11:41:38 AM
nope, and S.W.A.G.'s are very unlikely to get you the answer :P
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: jcj94 on April 26, 2011, 03:01:03 PM
No clue what that is... (S.W.A.G.'s ... or the answer to the riddle, explain your pick)
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: Freeza-CII on April 26, 2011, 06:53:54 PM
faces
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: CK9 on April 26, 2011, 07:45:00 PM
and the man with a bag over his gets it :P

btw: SWAG = Scientific Wild-Ass Guess
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: Freeza-CII on April 26, 2011, 08:37:22 PM
hehe it wasnt that hard to get. tho i did it in a weird way looking at your words and seeing time used then thinking it was a time thing then it clicked clocks have faces.

i dont really know any crappy riddles so some one else can take it.
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: CK9 on April 26, 2011, 11:33:30 PM
That is indeed an odd way of finding it out, heh

I wanted to say "you'll facepalm when you get it" but I figgured that would make it obvious.
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: jcj94 on April 27, 2011, 09:05:33 AM
What happens when no one is around?  What destroys life that others create?


All one riddle.

You'll never guess.
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: Hooman on April 27, 2011, 10:31:01 PM
Hanky Panky? :P

http://springfieldfiles.com/albums/books/0069.JPG (http://springfieldfiles.com/albums/books/0069.JPG)

"So You've Ruined Your Life"
  -- Dr. Hibbert ('s pamphlet), The Simpsons
 
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: Lord Of Pain on April 28, 2011, 08:19:37 AM
Quote
What Happen !??












Yes I think everyone knows this one by now :P
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: jcj94 on April 28, 2011, 07:59:59 PM
Nope.. quotes won't get you this one...


but S.W.A.G.'s might.. MIGHT.

It is a scientific answer.
Think: Crowds.
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: Highlander on April 29, 2011, 04:43:20 AM
Silence ?
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: Lord Of Pain on April 29, 2011, 07:47:48 AM
Quote
Nope.. quotes won't get you this one...


but S.W.A.G.'s might.. MIGHT.

It is a scientific answer.
Think: Crowds.
that was a riddle silly! not an answer to yours. :P



Quote
What happen ?!
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: jcj94 on April 29, 2011, 12:50:23 PM
Silly? Say's Lord Of Pain?

LOL.

has anyone guessed an answer to my riddle?
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: CK9 on April 29, 2011, 09:14:47 PM
'an answer'

now we have :P
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: jcj94 on May 02, 2011, 10:06:54 AM
*facepalm*

Is it safe to say you all have given up on mine?
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: Hooman on May 02, 2011, 11:00:59 PM
Extinction?


Because if it is..., well then, I should inform you that's not an option.  ;)
 
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: jcj94 on May 03, 2011, 11:29:03 AM
Your wrong, yet right... in a sense :P

Extinction fits... but isn't the answer I'm looking for. Thus, no, it is not an option.  Unless you plan to include the masters in your colony.  Then you can just let all hell break loose.
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: Lord Of Pain on May 04, 2011, 08:22:56 AM
Quote
...let all hell break loose.
You have now summoned the LORDOFPAIN, mortal, you will regret those words at the cost of your soul. :evil laugh:

-----

maybe you need to set a new question when nobody can guess?
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: Freeza-CII on May 04, 2011, 06:45:25 PM
the answer is nothing
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: jcj94 on May 05, 2011, 11:04:50 AM
Okay, nope (LOP)
and Sorry Freeza, try again.


 
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: Highlander on May 08, 2011, 02:41:23 PM
Since this riddle stopped the whole topic from progressing - just tell us the answer ?
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: jcj94 on May 08, 2011, 03:49:53 PM
Acid rain.

Okay, your riddle hooman!
or, CK9...
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: Freeza-CII on May 08, 2011, 09:05:11 PM
I really dont see acid rain in your riddle at all. perhaps it needed better wording.
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: jcj94 on May 08, 2011, 09:11:01 PM
Yeah, probably.


1:     You throw away the outside and cook the inside. Then you eat the outside and throw away the inside. What did you eat?

2:     I have holes in my top and bottom, my left and right, and in the middle. But I still hold water. What am I?

3:     The man who invented it doesn't want it. The man who bought it doesn't need it. The man who needs it doesn't know it. What is it?

4:     I am mother and father, but never birth or nurse. I'm rarely still, but I never wander. What am I?





 
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: Highlander on May 09, 2011, 01:47:38 AM
1) Corn / Maiz (or however one says/spell it)
2)
3) I know these two since I've recently used them myself in a quiz, so I'll leave them up to others
4) U/K
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: Hooman on May 09, 2011, 01:56:37 AM
2) Sponge.
 
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: jcj94 on May 09, 2011, 08:51:19 AM
No one has 4 yet but congrats Hooman & Highlander!
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: CK9 on May 09, 2011, 01:42:59 PM
1: You throw away the outside and cook the inside. Then you eat the outside and throw away the inside. What did you eat?

corn as answered...

2: I have holes in my top and bottom, my left and right, and in the middle. But I still hold water. What am I?

sponge..as answered...

3: The man who invented it doesn't want it. The man who bought it doesn't need it. The man who needs it doesn't know it. What is it?

Normally this is worded "the man who makes it doesn't want it", but a coffin

4: I am mother and father, but never birth or nurse. I'm rarely still, but I never wander. What am I?

A country.  Russia is known to be referenced to as 'The Motherland' as is Brittain and a few others.  Germans were known to call Germany the "Fatherland" during WW2 (don't know if they still do).  There will always be some form of unrest in a country ("...rarely still...") but it will never suddenly be in a different area than it is ("...never wander...")


Okay, how close am I on that last one?
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: jcj94 on May 10, 2011, 09:31:41 AM
Ohh, so close.  All but 4.

1: Corn
2: Sponge
3: Coffine
4: HAH, you thought I'd tell you :P
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: Highlander on May 10, 2011, 09:48:54 AM
4) Water something.. ? Wild guesses - The Ocean or A River ?
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: jcj94 on May 10, 2011, 01:00:28 PM
No, but something natural is correct
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: Freeza-CII on May 10, 2011, 05:03:20 PM
seahorse
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: jcj94 on May 10, 2011, 06:17:33 PM
Unique answer, but it births and nurses, so, sorry, wrong answer.
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: Freeza-CII on May 10, 2011, 06:28:54 PM
sawhorse
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: jcj94 on May 10, 2011, 09:22:38 PM
Nope.


Thinking to hard.  You probably see them everywhere, but take no notice of it.
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: Hooman on May 11, 2011, 12:52:58 AM
The Earth?
 
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: Freeza-CII on May 11, 2011, 02:15:43 AM
i see sawhorses every where.

Flabergastrioplexioscape
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: jcj94 on May 11, 2011, 09:35:43 AM
@Freeza-CII  What, do you work at Home Depot?

@Hooman, nope.  Comes out of the earth though.  


another hint:  air.
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: Freeza-CII on May 11, 2011, 01:16:06 PM
elements
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: Highlander on May 11, 2011, 01:47:17 PM
A tree ?
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: CK9 on May 11, 2011, 02:26:18 PM
Earth Wind and Fire!
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: jcj94 on May 11, 2011, 03:12:37 PM
AND HIGHLANDER TAKES THE PRIZE!!!!

He got #4.  It is in fact a tree.  It is both mother and father, but it doesn't give birth or nurse its offspring
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: Freeza-CII on May 11, 2011, 03:21:11 PM
it didnt have to be a tree just any plant
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: Hooman on May 11, 2011, 10:37:38 PM
What about worms, or other hermaphrodites?
 
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: evecolonycamander on May 12, 2011, 05:06:17 AM
ok, jcj, you've done too many. my turn >:}

seen and not
deadly yet brings life anew
is always around the world yet is often found in your home
the sun is colder
what is it?
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: Highlander on May 16, 2011, 02:33:25 PM
A fire ?
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: Freeza-CII on May 16, 2011, 06:40:29 PM
sounds more like love
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: evecolonycamander on May 20, 2011, 06:20:37 PM
both wrong.
one of those is kinda close though.

sorry bout, spelling. using IE
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: Hidiot on May 21, 2011, 03:14:11 AM
Electricity, in the form of lightning.
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: Highlander on May 22, 2011, 11:13:55 PM
*awaits the correct answer*
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: evecolonycamander on May 27, 2011, 05:09:29 PM
srry, i've been out... your right.
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: Deathagorn on September 18, 2012, 12:26:34 AM
Considering the last post was in 2011, I think its fine if I post a riddle here?

I have the ability to be sharp as a sword, but can't cut anything, be able to fry, but can't make food, and I can die, but I never live. What am I?
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: Hooman on September 20, 2012, 12:14:59 AM
Hmm.... This doesn't seem to be easily Google-able.  :whistle:

Swordfish... no, that lives.
Fire... no, that's not sharp.
Light? Light can be focused and "sharp". It generally doesn't cut things, but I suppose there are laser torches used to cut things. You can fry food, or at least ants, with sunlight and a magnifying lens. It doesn't really make food, although it is necessary for plant growth which does entail food. Light can "die" at the end of a day, but never really lives.

Ahh, that's the best I've got so far.
 
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: Deathagorn on September 20, 2012, 09:39:27 AM
Anyone else want to have a go at this?
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: Flashy on September 20, 2012, 11:20:42 AM
Is it coffee powder?
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: Highlander on September 20, 2012, 12:09:38 PM
I was thinking Words or Wind, but that wasn't entirely right.

My GF guesses it is the Sun.
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: Savant_Ace on September 21, 2012, 11:18:15 AM
The answer is quite obviously a potato.
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: Deathagorn on September 26, 2012, 04:01:28 PM
All somewhat good answers. The correct answer is a mind.
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: Spikerocks101 on September 27, 2012, 12:50:51 AM
A mind does live thou :/
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: Hooman on September 27, 2012, 01:09:09 PM
... fried brains?  :o  
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: Savant_Ace on September 28, 2012, 09:19:49 AM
Yeah that part is a little off.  
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: Deathagorn on October 02, 2012, 06:53:06 PM
Your mind can by sharp, meaning quick and smart. You could fry it by overworking it. And you can end up brain dead. x_x
Title: Crummy Joke Riddles.
Post by: Hooman on October 03, 2012, 01:00:06 AM
Ahh, that makes a little more sense now.